Friday, February 18, 2011

On Teaching

So, having spent a few weeks starting my chosen profession, I think I am at least slightly qualified to blog about it. Also, I haven't written anything on my blog for quite some time and thought that situation should be fixed. At any rate, as I've been in the public school system for about a month or so, I've learned a few things about 9th graders. They are as follows.

First of all, when you think of 9th graders in a classroom, you generally envision something like this:
I mean, look how pleasant and orderly they are. That is kind of how I pictured a classroom, and in some cases it's been the case. In fact, I have a couple classes that are quite orderly and well-behaved. However, some of my classes, (especially one of my fourth-period classes) are more like this:
You don't believe it, but I'll tell you it's the truth. If some of these children had teeth like that, I would have a valid reason to murder them, which is something they almost beg me to do (not in so many words) every time they enter my classroom. (Note to any worried/paranoid blog stalkers: I am not going to murder any children. That's a thing we call exaggeration, and it's my way of saying that they drive me crazy. Please do not turn me in to the government.) Anyway, those kids are evil. In fact, I've taken to calling them "Satan's Children" to my friends, which, I suppose would make them Hellboy, but they're not nearly as cool as he is, and a lot less respectful.

Another thing that I've learned is that I am pretty much awesome. Well, I already knew that, but it's been reinforced. I mean, come on. The fact that I can teach these kids all about world geography is pretty amazing. Plus, there's the fact that I'm just so much cooler and smarter than they are. I mean, I'm pretty sure that I feel good about myself just about every day because of that. I pause for a minute and think, "Oh, yeah, I'm a lot cooler than these guys." My dad did tell me when I was just starting that I should remember the following: "You're fighting a war of intelligence with a bunch of people who are only partially armed." He was right. Anyway, I believe that finishes this post. At the moment I'm actually at school, killing time until my 30 minutes after school is out is over so I can go home. Actually, that reminds me of something else: Students really suck at turning in their work on time. Take right now for example. A student told me TODAY that he would be taking the test that he missed right now. Is he taking it? NO. That happens ALL. THE. TIME. I mean seriously! Be true to your word!

Anyway, I really am done this time, because I get to leave in one minute. This is Captain Danger out.


  1. You're awesome, Cliff. But you already knew that.

  2. hahahahahaha.

    i should be more concerned about this post than i am.

  3. Absolutely awesome that you are teaching 9th graders. They are lucky to have you. But as Pear said, you probably already knew that. :)